Discover the Handy Way to Nodge Back Pain Away

Sunday 31 Aug, 2014 


Last weekend I decided I couldn’t avoid it any longer.

Since 2005 when I started writing this newsletter my adorable wife has been telling me I need to clear out our garage.

If for no other reason than it would be a handy place the park the car overnight!

Being short in the Brownie Points account (an overly long stay at the pub Friday night was to blame for that) I saw it as a way to salvation.

But I should have remembered that there is always a price to be paid... more about that later.

Saturday morning dawned with Lara heading out to do the shopping and get the school clothes sorted for the start of a new term.

She stood and watched as I opened the doors to the garage – a suspicion of a smug grin on her face – she knew she had won.

I, on the other hand, was preoccupied with dodging the falling boxes, tent bags and bin liners that began to avalanche out to freedom.

“You lucky boy! Do enjoy yourself in there,” shouted Lara as she waved goodbye.

I grumbled into the mound of detritus in a manner much like Muttley muttering against Dick Dastardly! It wasn’t a pleasantry I offered in reply – let’s leave it at that.

Looking at the bashed and broken items that lay before me I immediately regretted my decision.

But not as much as I was to do later that day.

Have you been afflicted by aching joints and muscles? Discover a real helping hand here

The story of a broken man

I set to with grim determination.

Pulling apart the tangled bags and boxes and hunting through them.

Clothes that I thought long lost were much in evidence, and I suspect that I had discovered Lara’s hiding place for my most hideous Hawaiian shirts and voluminous shorts – I felt like I was meeting up with old friends.

I sneaked some of them back into the house – revenge was mine.

But even I had to admit that some of them deserved to be sent to a recycling centre, if only to preserve sanity.

For hour after hour I struggled through the mess, loading the back of the car with items for the tip, recycling centre and charity shops depending upon their state of repair (or disrepair – why did we keep the hoover that blew up?).

Constantly bending, stretching, lifting and reaching over the endless piles of junk until a breakthrough...

...I finally got to see the back wall: quite possibly the first sighting of such in nearly 10 years.

It was the spur I needed for one last push, once more unto the brink dear friends!

I dived back in to find a huge tea chest full of mouldering novels and textbooks.

Oh dear.

Now I know what I should have done was take the books out and stack them in the car, but I was feeling invincible so I grabbed the wooden box and gave it a heave-ho.

Quickly followed by a squeal, another yelp as the dropped box landed on my toes and an awful lot of Welsh close-harmony swearing!

Normally such a rash action would have sent my lower back into spasm.

But due to the width of the box I was attempting to lift I was now enduring a sharp and aggressive pain between my shoulder blades and into my mid-back.

Aware that I was arousing interest from my neighbours and quite possibly the local constabulary, I limped into the house.

How on earth was I going to get myself sorted?

Lara was long gone with our daughter in tow and the two boys were out with mates, leaving me home alone and very much troubled.

Then I remembered that salvation was at hand.

I was going to nodge myself back into shape...

...reaching the bits that were beyond my grasp otherwise.

Why don’t you try the world acclaimed Back Nodger for yourself – 90 day no risk trial available now

The good lady returns

So there I am leaning against my desk using this brilliant little device to work through the tortured muscles in my back, when the light of my life returns.

“See you only managed half a job then!” she snorted, “I suppose it’s down to me to finish what you’ve started once again.”

Hurtful to say the least.

I did my best to explain my predicament, but no sympathy was evident.

“You should know better at your age!” was as close as I got.

She disappeared into the living room to begin the fashion parade with our daughter, whilst I whittled away the knots and tender spots.

After about 20 minutes of working the Back Nodger over the afflicted areas I felt in better shape to finish the job.

Gritting my teeth I returned to my task.

I was much more careful as I loaded the last of the collected wisdom of my past into the car.

Then swept up the floor, pulled down the cobwebs hanging from the ceiling and replaced the long ago blown bulb.

If things got any worse with Lara I could at least sleep in the clean and dry garage now, I thought.

A quick trip around my various points of deposit and home for a well earned cup of tea.

I picked up the Back Nodger once more and worked through the aching and sore muscles from my exertions.

I smiled as I heard Lara back the car into the pristine garage, safe in the knowledge that I, Ray Collins, had won the day...

...and gently pushed the pile of punk band t-shirts, reclaimed vinyl albums and roaringly loud summer shirts under my desk.

Treasured possessions returned to their rightful place... small victories keep me sane (well as much as I ever am!)

Make a difference to nagging pain with your own personal magic wand    

Yours, as always



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